Uriah Gabriel Marquez is now thirteen months old. He is a monster! He is just learning to walk and has that Frankenstein-like quality to his swagger. We keep catching him in precarious positions, in which, he seems unfazed. He is some kind of invincible Mr. Magoo, shatter-proof, buoyant, omni-eating, head bonking machine that can't be stopped. I could go on about the way he goes unscathed, by the various tortures his sisters have imposed while the force him to play the roll of their live doll. Or the way he can swallow a penny in infancy and be none-the-worse. I can add to his mythological status by telling the tale of his attempt at flight from a second story window...
But since most of you have not yet heard it, I will tell the story of: Death by Fanblade (not to worry, he doesn't die or even get seriously injured- but it's still a good story).
It all happened on a warm dry day in New Mexico when the inmates of Marquez Manor were suffering from cabin fever. Having not been able to participate in their daily outdoor recreational time, Anna and Emma, of the notorious Girlies gang, decided to flex their muscles and make a territorial claim. They wanted to send a message that Girlies are not to be disturbed during cartoon time. Things seemed quiet, perhaps too quiet. Just as suspicion of the ominous silence before the storm set in, Tiffanie heard the scream of the monster. As she arrived at the scene, she was taken aback by what she saw: the monster on the ground by means of a chord wrapped around his neck. Such a sight is disturbing to be sure, but that is not the half of it. The chord belonged to the fan; the fan whose housing had fallen from its incasing. As the fan blades spun freely- freely on the monster's face, Tiffanie plucked him from tragedy. The girlies were sequestered to solitary (nap time), the monster was adequately comforted and peace was brought back to reigning order. Upon further examination, not a scratch or bruise or any sign of harm could be found- my invincible monster!
...And they all lived happily ever after!
5 comments:
I don't know to laugh or not! How horrible! I am so glad he is okay!Okay, I do have to laugh, that is so funny, just the way you re-told it! Poor Uriah...I guess that one will go down in Marquez family history.
Wow, that's crazy! Perhaps he is destined for something special.
Joe
OK. The verbosity and Adam-isms here are incredibly satisfying. :) I'm seeing it all now -- Uriah . . . a mini-Adam. Smoking tiny cigars and soaking in the Francis Shaeffer board books. Unscathed by anything that comes his way . . .
love it :) you should write kids books :)
Megan, that is so funny (and maybe a little scary)!
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