Things I Want My Kids to Know #7: Choose What You Love

When I sold furniture, I often gave advise on colors and patterns. The advise was counterintuitive to many and helpful to some.

I observed that people often wanted to purchase furniture that was as understated as possible: drab colors, minimal if any patterns and textures, and non-confrontational designs. The thinking was that neutral purchases created versatility. People were afraid of committing to something with which they would have to live. They wanted their furniture to be a kind of blank canvas. They wanted the option to switch things up as soon as they tired of their costly purchase. I would often find a client in love with a bold color or pattern. The thought of something so bold would quickly be abandoned in favor for something more bland. I had the habit of encouraging people to pursue their bolder tastes.

When the objection came up that a more bold choice was not long-term thinking, I would ask the question: "If you don't love it now, what makes you think that you will love it then?" I continued, "If you love it now, you are putting the odds in your favor that you will love it then as well." I was also known for saying things like: "If you are defining neutrality in terms of versatility, you may want to rethink that drab color which happens to clash with half of the color spectrum, and which brings out the best in no color; perhaps you should go with deep blue beside which every color looks stunning." I encouraged people to mix patterns and textures. I encouraged each person to express his or her personality with the intended result being that each room would feel like an extension of the person who chose its furnishings.

I want each of my kids to be bold, to be courageous, to express himself or herself in everything. I don't want my kids to kowtow to the gods of what-if and just-in-case. Planning ahead and being disciplined are good things, but compromising expression for theoretical versatility is a kind of cowardice all its own.